Three Things You Need When Your Adult Child Says, “I am gay.”

To Christian parents, those three words are a shock, beginning a cascade of difficult feelings. Despite the cultural shift, most Christians still disagree that adopting a gay identity is a good move so hearing those three words still brings anguish. After years of AffirmingGender ministry, I find this to be an increasingly common experience among those I address who are …

Qualified to Speak: An admiration of Glenn T. Stanton

A question often asked of me while Affirming Gender is how to deal with friends or loved ones making gender decisions we feel are bad for them. A book I often recommend, especially if short on time to answer, is Glenn T. Stanton’s Loving My (LGBT) Neighbor: Being Friends in Grace and Truth (2014). Mr. Stanton gets gender in a …

Desires are Moral

A reader writes: My understanding has been that same sex attraction that is not acted upon is not sin.  Is a Christian who struggles with same sex attraction, yet in living for the Lord, doesn’t act on these desires, sinning?  Is being tempted, yet resisting temptation,  still evil? I thought it would be correct to tell a friend wrestling with …

Roses and Champagne in a Field of Butter

The same year enGendered was published (2015), Rosaria Champagne Butterfield released Openness Unhindered: Further Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert on Sexual Identity and Union with Christ. I want AffirmingGender readers to know of this work.   This sequel to her first Christian book opens with further reflections on her conversion. As she goes on, Dr. Butterfield gives us a refreshing …

When Girlfriends are No Longer Safe

A college freshman friend of mine recently found herself in a sad plight, now sadly typical. Young women, transitioning from high school to college, often crave close relationship. If you are such a young woman, to find a girlfriend, with whom you really connect, feels like a gift from heaven. Because it is. A close same-gendered friend is so much …

Does Same Sex Attraction Run in the Family?

In a recent counseling meeting, a man with same sex attraction (SSA) was telling me about his relationship with his father. As an aside, he mentioned the time he discovered, to his surprise, that his father had experienced SSA at one point as well. I have heard this before, but it is usually a hard slice of information to come …

A Homosexual in Hell

The 13th century Florentine author, Dante Alighieri, wrote The Divine Comedy to give an allegorical look at life after death, and Volume I, Inferno, describes the famous circles of hell. His portrayal offers an important insight into the path to hell and a godly attitude towards those on it.

Beyond Zebra–Explaining LGBTQQCIAAPPP, Part II

You may feel confused or like you cannot keep up. There is a reason for that. In the last post, I started to explain the letters in the inevitable proliferation of categories when God’s image categories of man and woman in relationship are rejected. We got through C. Let’s start out easy with perhaps the clearest term of all:   …

Public Service Announcement: Explaining the letters: LGBTQQCIAAPPP

For those who feel behind, I thought it helpful to explain the letters of our now LGBTQQCIAAPPP culture. I will not stoop to jokes about deli sandwiches or Campbell’s soup competitions, but just give you straight definitions…well, reasonably straight. As straight as one can be on the subject. So if you have been afraid to ask what the initials mean, you …