He shall do according to all that
proceeds out of his mouth. If a woman
vows A vow to the Lord, and binds herself
by a pledge, while within her father's
house, and her youth, and her father
hears of her vow and of her pledge by
which she has bound herself, and says
nothing to her, then all her vows shall
stand, and every pledge. By which she has
bound herself shall stand.
But if her father opposes her on the day
that he hears of it, no vow of hers,
no pledge by which she has bound herself,
shall stand, and the Lord will forgive
her because her father opposed her, if
she marries a husband while under her
vows, or any thoughtless utterance of her
lips by which she has bound herself. And
her husband hears of it, and says nothing
to her. On the day that he hears, then
her vows shall stand, and her pledges by
which she has bound herself shall stand.
But if on the day that her husband comes
to hear of it, he opposes her, then he
makes void her vow that was on her, and
the thoughtless utterance of her lips by
which she has bound. Yourself and the
Lord will forgive her. But any vow of a
widow, or of a divorced woman, anything
by which she has bound herself, shall
stand against her. And if she vowed in
her husband's house, or bound herself by
a pledge with an oath, and her husband
heard of it, and said nothing to her, and
did not oppose her. Then all her vows
shall stand, and every pledge by which
she has bound herself shall stand. But
if her husband makes them null and void
on the day that he hears them, then
whatever proceeds out of her lips
concerning her vows, or concerning her
pledge of herself, shall not stand. Her
husband has made them void, and the Lord
will forgive her. Any vow and any binding
oath to afflict herself, her husband may
establish. Or her husband may make void.
But if her husband says nothing to her
from day-to-day, then he establishes all
her vows or all her pledges that are upon
her. He has established them because he
said nothing to her on the day that he
heard of them. But if he makes them null
and void after he has heard of them, then
he shall bear. Your iniquity. These are
the statutes that the Lord commanded
Moses about a man and his wife, and about
a father and his daughter, while she is
in her youth within her father's house.
This is the word of the Lord.
Recently I went to two
events presentations that I found
very interesting or relevant to
my discourse this morning. The
first was. A lecture by
Eve Ensler at the Russian Tea
Room. It's really nice there. This
was a lecture that she was
being given. Eve Ensler, who is
the author of an original originator
of the Vagina dot Vagina Monologues.
And that has been a phenomenal success
around the world. And Ensler has built
upon that success. And actually she's
she's gotten a kind of privileged access
to the world scene. And what she's done
is she's gone around, tried to seek out
and tried to address areas where it's a
severe problem of. Violence against women
and against girls. And it's, it's
inspiring listening to her, but it's
also heartbreaking. You realize how big
a problem this this continues to
be in the world, you know,
especially in third world countries where
there's, you know, kind of routine
mutilation. And and cutting of women.
The UN According to the UN,
1/3 of the women on the
planet at some time in their
life will be physically or sexually
abused. So these are difficult facts
and. And what she's
done, Antler has tried to address them
in very different creative ways going
around. What I found
particularly interesting while I was
listening to her was that at one
point. She was bemoaning
how she had gone to one place
that had a real movement there of
liberating women and empowering them, and
that was a number of decades ago.
Then she came back and she was
in the area and addressing women and
she was finding that. The problems and
the feelings were there all over again.
So she was distraught about this and she
was asking, why are we back here? We've
kind of liberated these women. Why are we
now back in the same place having to deal
with these issues again? What is it going
to take to really help women?
And then she said this is a kind of
answer that she came up with and
struggling with this, she said, you know,
the abuse isn't going to stop. The
problems aren't going to really stop. The
demeaning of women, it's not going to
stop. Until men come
to treasure women.
And she was saying, you know, the way she
says and their private parts, but she
said it, men have to be involved in this
solution of treasuring women. And that
really started me wondering about that
answer and started wondering, you know,
if you take the approach, it seems
logical if they're, you know, some group
is being hurt. That you empower
them through various means in
solidarity with other women.
Is that going to? Is that going to be
really addressing the problem in a way?
That that makes it, that solves it.
And or is it really a solution
that needs to be involving the
relationship between men and women? And
how is it, I was thinking, how
is it that men become people who
treasure the women around them? Well, the
Bible has a solution. The Bible actually
directs people in in a way to address
this problem. And actually the next two
weeks we're going to be looking at this
issue and how the Bible elevates women.
But the approach that the Bible has to
elevating women might seem
counterintuitive to us as we're going to
look at it today in the household and.
Next week in the covenant community and
at large to see what the Bible
says about it. But it's very natural
actually, as we read through the Bible,
as we go through it.
The way that we do in this church, going
through the Book of Numbers say it's very
natural to to to talk about women's
issues because the Bible talks so much
about women.
But before I actually get into the
passage, I'm going to have to try to
address something that is difficult for
many of us. These days.
And that is for for you to be open
to the wisdom of God. That I think is
in this passage for us. The first thing
you have to do is be open to the
reality of gender, that gender is
something that's real and given to us by
God for a reason, for our relationships.
And that's, that's hard, you know,
especially in our context these days, in
our cultural context, gender is not
something that's acknowledged. Or if it
is, it's supposed to be something to get
past. It's something to bear with and to
try to, you know, it's a burden.
So how do we understand this? Well,
the other The other event that I
went to recently that I found fascinating
was a panel discussion at the NYU
Fells Library and Bob's Library. It was
a panel discussion put on by the.
NYU Food Studies program.
And it was called post gender food
writing. Post gender food, right?
It was a panel discussion on this. Now I
don't have a lot of interest in food
writing myself, but I have a lot of
interest in how people are trying to get
past gender. So I went to see
as it was very crowded and I found the
reason they were having the panel is
because of the experience of the
panelists. One of the panelists was
Adam Rappaport, whose editor in chief of
Bon Appetit magazine, and he recently
came there, used to be at GQ, but
he was there because he was surprised
when he came to Bon Appetit to head
that up. He was very surprised to find
that the vast majority of the readership.
As women, he didn't know this, but it
turns out that's the case with Bon
Appetit. So he was there kind of kind
of wondering about this, wanting to think
about this and talk about this. Also,
there was Lauren Shockey, who was a food
critic for the Village Voice, and she was
there because she had recently gone
through the NYU Food Studies program and
she noticed when she was in the program
that 95% of the people in the food
studies program were women, 95%. So she
was there. And you know what? What is
this about? Then you had Lisa McLaughlin
there. Lisa McLaughlin, who's the chief
editor of the Food Republic, who is is an
online magazine talking about food. But
what she sees in this is a marketing
opportunity. McLaughlin was there saying,
well, you know, if it's mostly women who
are kind of thinking about food and and
engaging the media. How food, there's a
market there for men. How do we tap
into the men's market? So Food Republic
is this new thing that they do or
she says it's, it's about food without
cupcakes. And so they talk about, you
know, dressing venison or something. I
don't know if she's trying to get that
market. That's why she was there. Now,
you know, friends, I'm not going to give
you a comment on this. I, I don't
know what this means. I, I don't, I'm
not interested in what it means. I have
no idea why women are more represented,
overrepresented here in the food writing
industry or the food, you know, about
food industry. I've I
have no idea why. I mean, men
eat as much as women do, right?
More right, probably. So
I have no idea. The reason why I, I'm
bringing this up actually is because
another panelist, Mitchell Davis, who is
the vice president of the James Beard
Foundation, he was also there. And what
made me, I was sitting there in the back,
what made me sit bolt upright and, and
turn my head and suddenly I was. Was
riveted is because at a certain
point Mitchell Davis stops the
conversation. And he says,
wait a second, He says, I don't
know what we mean by this phrase,
post gender, he said, I can't even
imagine what the world would be like
without gender. I could. I can't imagine
what a post gender world would be
like. And he said. This is this is
amazing because this is James Beard. If
you know, this is not the guy who would
say something like this. And he said
actually and thinking about it, I'm not
sure we even want a post gender world.
And I was so surprised I
almost fell off my chair because
why?Because that is a
first time that I've ever heard, I
think, since childhood, in a public forum
in New York. A statement
that perhaps gender is something that's
real. For decades I haven't
heard anything like, not only is it
something that's real, but it might
actually even be something good for us.
And I was, I almost fell off my chair
at this point. I was so happy because I
thought, and the reason why I was happy,
I thought this is happy because this
might represent a thaw.
This might represent a thaw in the gender
freeze that's been refrigerating now for
decades. And if it's the case, if people
are at a place where the same man, Gee,
maybe this is there's something to this
gender that's it's not just a social
construct that we can do away with by
more education. Maybe there's something
to this if that's the case. I was
happy because it means that going forward
in the future, this culture is going to
provide less of an obstacle to you in
receiving the Bible's wisdom about
relationships. That's
what I was thinking, but in order to
enter into what the Bible says, the first
thing you have to kind of accept, open
yourself up to at least. Is that
gender is real. And it's not just
real, it's a real gift to us.
It's something that God gave us and
made in us for a purpose.
If you can do that, come along with me.
Let's look at the passage now, the
number, the Book of Numbers.
Is about constituting an army. It's all
about making up an army to go and
take over and possess the promised land.
But even though it's all about making up
an army, God seems to care very much
about this army's home life, right? Verse
16, For some reason we're getting this
statute about a man and his wife, a
father and his daughter. In other words,
it's about relationships in the
household. There's a funny way to run
a war, isn't it?But
this is no ordinary war.
And the, the, the substance of the vow,
the substance of the law is about vows,
right? It's about the words that come out
of our mouth. And, and just to simplify
it, we could say what they're talking
about here is matters of import about
which we speak. His vows generally took
the form of a sacrifice. And there are
different kinds, generally you could say
making a commitment to do something. To
abstain from something, it's hard to know
what. What's in view here, specifically
what kind of bows. Because verse 8, in
some places it seems like it's a bad
vow, a rash promise. In other places it
seems like it's about a self denial or
affliction. Verse 13, maybe a good valve,
maybe a Nazarite valve. Because women.
We're also Nazarites, but what kind of
vow it is maybe be beside the point.
It's something. It's matters of import.
It's about keeping our word on matters of
import. But this
is the this is the substance of the law.
But through that substance of the law,
we're taught something about gender.
Because there's a contrast, isn't there?
There's a contrast between verse 2 and
verses 3 through 5. A
man's vow, if he makes it, stands even
if he lives in his father's house, he
has to keep it. A woman's vow can
be rescinded by her father or, if
married, by her husband, and that applies
even to vows being made before marriage,
verses 6 through 8, as well as during
marriage. Verses 10 through 12. All
right. So that's the, the basic, that is
what the law is saying. If you're, if
your mind wandered during the reading,
that's what's going on in the law.
There's some authority here that's being
expressed. And what was this law going
to do? It was going to one. It was going
to train two different ways. It was going
to train a young man to measure his words
carefully. On the other hand, I
would train a young woman to acknowledge
a masculine authority in her life.
One is being trained to speak
less, measure words carefully, others
being invited to speak freely but
given safeguards on that speech.
We're in either case, words are serious.
Might be good news to guys who don't
want to talk much. Limit your words. It's
saying to you, you said, ohh, yeah,
that's great. I could get into that. But
whether you talk much or not, there's
something that's being said about the
importance of our words and keeping to
our words. Now here it is, though we
see an asymmetry. That's being introduced
in in the responsibilities of men and
women to each other in family
relationships. It's, it's, it's,
it's simply an asymmetry that's there,
that's being taught. And the reason
why this is difficult because I,
well, I just think many of
us might find that patently offensive.
I mean, you might feel that it's
demeaning to even have a difference
there, to even make a difference.
For a woman to be distinguished from a
man in this way, a man who also has a
father and a spouse, but he has, he
doesn't have the same constraint laid on
him. So that's
the difficulty. We have to understand
this morning and and see if we're looking
at it the right way.
I'm not here this morning to apologize
for the Bible's teaching.
I'm here to try to show you that that
teaching is something that's good for us.
How this passage is really teaching both
men and women something very important
about how to live together in a way
that goes with the reality of gender.
And let me do that by first pointing
out to you what is being, what is
being expressed in verse 11. There's
something very important for us to get,
and that is that a woman is expected.
To be making vows and speaking
important pledges.
The scripts or the law itself is
expecting vow making women to be out and
at large.
You see that phrase in verse 11. All
her vows, every pledge shall stand.
There's a woman should be out there and
they should be talking. And
they should be making promises. This is
this is part of the women. What what goes
on. You see, it would have been
very simple if God really wanted to
demean women if that was what he was
after here, or somehow put women in their
place. It would be very simple. Friends,
just make a law that says women can't
make a vow.
Then there would be no need for these
various statutes, right? Just tell the
women to shut up. Now
that would be demeaning. But God
is after something else. You
see, what the law does not say is pay no
attention to the woman's words. She's
just a woman. Can't
take what she says seriously. Now
that is not the law, nor is it any, nor
do you find it anywhere in the attitude
of the Bible. Of the
whole Bible, which should be staggering
to us when we think about the length
of time over which the Bible was written
and the various cultural contexts in
which the biblical writers wrote should
be staggering to us. That you
never find that attitude in the Bible.
Now the women should be talking to
woman's words matter very much, be taken
seriously. God wants her apparently out
there making vows, issuing promises. And
what we're getting here, first of all,
is the underlying equality that's
expressed in the word. Of
women and men that genders don't rate
people one over the other. The different
callings that are being described in
close relationships. Don't change your
ontological equality before God. Both
from the very beginning made in the image
of God. Something
that's implied in here, stressed in
other places. But nonetheless,
God gives these different kind of
responsibilities, different ways to lean
in a relationship.
How come he does that?Well, I
want to tell you why into kind of two
parts. And this is always the way we
need to talk about gender. This is the
way that the Bible does it. The first way
is I want to, I want to explain what this
law does for the woman. By what it's
teaching the man. And then I want to
talk about what it does for the man by
what it's teaching the woman. OK, first
of all, what does it do for the woman?
Well, what? What is this law trying to
do, really?
Let let me ask you this. Here's a
question. Why doesn't why doesn't the
chapter and the law end at verse 12?
You'll notice by verse 12 kind of all
the informations out there, basically the
laws been given is not really anything
that's added in terms of you know, new,
you know, new, new case or anything but
verse 12.
Though the law has been clearly explained
and yet it goes on. What do you see
happening in verses 13 through 14? What
do you? What do you? Why do you think
it makes this? The author makes this deal
about hearing making a decision in the
same day. See if he hears he doesn't do
anything, no matter how much the vow
costs, he pays. If he doesn't say
anything and deal with it as it occurs,
he bears the cost.
Do you see what it's doing? Verse
14 especially is fanning the flame of
responsibility on issues that are
important to the wife.
In other words, friends. This
law is designed to get the men
to engage. To
force him to be responsive in
the marriage to issues of import
in the wife.
And putting him in charge does exactly
that. So
you see, this law is not irrelevant to
us. It is so wise in terms of what
we actually deal with in marriage.
Because it is addressing you see the
usual sin that happens at home all
the time, every day, day after day,
as women try to talk to their
men. And, and what do
they get? What kind of response do they,
I'm not talking about the first couple of
years of marriage. I'm talking about
after that. What is the response that the
women get? They are trying to get a
response and it's usually through the
newspaper or around the computer screen.
Or in the middle of the video game.
Right? And what is the response that they
get? Ohh, sure honey, whatever you say.
Just fine, fine, whatever you say.
Or, you know, with a daughter asking for
a response. You know, honey, Absolutely.
Yeah. Just get out of my line of sight.
Boom boom.
Now listen, maybe you're a man here
and this never happens to you. Maybe
you are eminently interruptible. And
you're always attentive to matters of
import in the women in your life.
And if that's you, I have one thing to
say to you. God bless you, God
bless you. You can stand up and leave.
Really kind of good. I
I bless you.
But for the other 99% of us,
this happens every day. This is the
issue. All the time you
husband, you father, you tune out that
voice. Where you learn to engage it
on a superficial level so that it stops.
God is saying no, you cannot live
with a woman that way. You must
listen to her at the time you
must engage.
So you see, God's command, what he's
doing is laying on a on the husband, a
responsibility that he may not be
inclined to take on.
You want her to just get along without
you, don't you? Be independent, make your
own decisions without the hindrance of
you having to to listen and engage and
decide. That is until you need something.
Until you want something from her.
And God is saying, no, it's not the way
that you could do it. That's why he,
that's why the husband has given us
authority. If you don't understand
that, it's your job, not hers. Your
job given to you by God.
You will be less inclined to do it.
Because it you're really not
needed. But
instead you have a command from God.
These these husbands had a command from
God saying you are needed. Actually this
is your job.
You know, I, I remember some talk about
Apple's perfect application. I was a few
years ago, my wife and I were having
a garage sale and we were did all
this work, especially her to, to bring up
this bring all these things out on the
lawn, you know, and price them. It was
a lot of work getting. All of this
together and then during the garage sale,
you know, people were coming by and
during the garage sale I had to go out
and get something. I went out and I came
back and when I come back, my wife had
this man had come up and had kind of
talked her into.
Paying him to cut off the limbs of of
the trees above our garage. And you know,
they, they were getting kind of shaggy.
So he said, I'll, I'll get up there. I'll
cut them off. I have this tool. And which
was, which was OK, except that it was an
exorbitant amount of money that she had
agreed to. It was really wasn't
worth it for that and she didn't wasn't
quite aware of that and I was I came
back and I found out about this sort of
about is perfect application as fast as
you know that at that point for me to
cherish her. Would be to be
able to step in and say to the guy, well,
you know what? Well, we can't quite do it
this way. But you know, I know this is
what my wife said, but look, we need to
work something out. We can't pay you
this. So, you know, either he hadn't
quite, you know, started, he just
started. I said, we'll just do part of it
or or you know, take a different price or
something like that and I didn't do it.
Because I was afraid. I was afraid
of how I'd looked at him. So
I did nothing and consequently just about
all the money that we got in the garage
sale went into this guy's pocket.
And I look back at it like it's funny, I
can't read this passage actually without
looking back at this and and just
expressed just feeling regret about it
because realizing there that at that
point I didn't cherish my wife.
And I needed this law to teach me.
You know what this law does? It, it, it
trains guys in responsibility. It, it
actually trains them out of decisiveness
to take this principle, because some of
us guys, we can't make up our minds.
You know, but what we're needed in the
household is we need the the household
needs us to make up our minds. The
women in our lives need us to be
decisive, to learn decisiveness, You
know, not that there isn't deliberation
at times, but. A husband, a
father, has to be able to make a decision
when there are matters of import, when
it's important, when it's difficult and
when he might be wrong. Has to
be able to make a decision. That's what
they need. So
for us reading it today, what I
would say for you as men to
read this, make changes in your life
to do this. For the
women who are in your life, if you
have trouble being interrupted, set up a
regular time for her.
Set up a regular time. I was talking with
a friend of mine and, and he was saying,
you know, well, my wife when everything,
when she has something on her mind or
something comes up, everything has to
stop. And, and it, you know, cause a lot
of stress because everything has stopped
at that moment. I said, well, you know,
maybe it would help if you set up a
regular time so that she would know. At
this time, her issues are going to be
addressed, you know, then you wouldn't
just everything else to grind to a halt
at that time. He said, well, no, that
wouldn't work. That's just the way that
she is, you know, because of all this
stress, you know, that's the difference
between my wife and your wife and. You
know, I have a lot of respect for my
friend, but with all with all due
respect, I disagree with him about a lot
of things. I respect about his life. But
in this I think that. Actually
making a motion. To
set this up as a way of cherishing
that does something to a woman.
In other words, what this what this law
is urging us to do, what it's trying to
convey is just how cherished a wife is
supposed to be. And this
cherishing does something. It shows her
her value.
Paying attention to her on matters of
import for her, her vows, it does
something inside of her. It makes her
a woman who becomes confident in her
words, really does. It makes her a
woman who better trusts God.
And I wish, I wish I
could convey this better, but when
when you are attentive to her,
your attentiveness validates her and her
goals to a depth that that
not even Oprah can reach.
Or or or a dozen women's magazines that
are trying to empower her.
You want to see a truly empowered woman?
It's not an independent woman. It's
a woman whose men in her life are
attentive to her.
That is what this law does to her.
That is what actually empowers us and
empowers her. It's when those these
things are happening in her
relationships. So
in taking responsibility to be attentive,
you make your woman a real woman.
Well, that's what the law is teaching a
man. Now
the other side What is the law doing for
a man by what it's teaching a woman?
What? What would you? How should you read
this as a woman today?
Well, I would say the most important
thing to do in reading this law as
a woman is to say.
Use your father. Use
your husband. Think of them as God's
gift to you. To check your
decisions, your words of import, you
know, we're always looking, running
around, looking for guidance. Well,
there's someone in most of your lives
whom God says through laws like this he
would like to use.
For guidance.
Talk a lot. Make a lot of commitments if
that's your inclination. And bring
him those things of import and require
his input. You could ask those questions
of him. Did I say the right thing or did
I promise something I shouldn't have?
You know, my wife and I, we don't talk
about this thing about authority or
submission. We don't talk about it at
all. But it goes on a lot. It
goes on, sort of implied. It goes on
all the time, largely because she has
made the decision to use me.
And you know what else she's done is
she's created high expectations for me.
And that's the other thing you should
understand as a woman reading this law.
You should have high expectations for the
men in your life. That
means if you are single. And you're
looking around for a guy, You want to
look for a man who can lead in this way,
who can lead you, who would be actually
trustworthy with this kind of a
responsibility, or at least someone in
whom you see that potential. You at least
see the potential there. If it's
not there, you should look for someone
else.
If you are married and if you have a
guy, a father or a husband, don't don't
have lower expectations for him than what
this passage says.
Because those expectations.
Make your husband a man.
This is hard sometimes, especially it's
hard especially for single women to get
about the dynamic, especially if their
relationship with their dad is not so
great. They don't see this dynamic at
all. But this is
it, friends. Your expectations of your
husband go a long way to making
him who he needs to be.
Because it does something in him, these
actions, these vow submitting women, it
does something to the guys. You
understand. Do you understand what you're
giving him when you give him this
prerogative?You're
making him somebody who can handle
authority. Because you can't
make a person who handles authority well
without handing him authority.
Doesn't happen.
That he can't learn to shoot unless you
hand him the gun.
Well, maybe that's not such a great
metaphor here. Well, actually it is
a good metaphor. Why? Because it's
dangerous. It's dangerous for you to do
this. I know that it makes you vulnerable
to do this. That's absolutely true. The
danger is like Andy and a gun. And you
know what? God knows that too. God knows
it too, that you put yourself in a
vulnerable place. In fact, that's why he,
I think that's why he enforces it by the
leadership. In verse one, you notice that
it's addressed to the leaders. Actually,
this law is addressed to the leaders
rather than the people at large. I think
that's a small detail, but in fact it's
rare to find. I don't know if there's
another place, but it's very rare to find
a law addressed to the leaders rather
than to the people altogether.
But this one is, I think, expected
to be overseen by the leadership in
the in their community.
You know, it's not ultimate authority
that this is talking about. It's not an
ultimate authority that a wife hands a
husband.
God must have that place for her. The
only place of ultimate authority for for
a woman is God.
And she has to assert that at times.
But this is a circumscribed authority for
his advancement as a man. That's what
she's giving him. If you have
a man in your life, this is how to read
this flaws of woman care enough about him
to advance him.
So friends, these are my thoughts and
This is why I said this law is good.
You know, I would, I would not be
advocating this kind of asymmetry in
roles in a family if I didn't think that
it was good for a woman. I have a
daughter, you know, I have a daughter
myself, and I don't want her demeaned. I
don't want her to be any less than who
she is. I don't want her personality
squelched or lost. I don't want that for
my daughter. I don't want that for my
wife. I don't. I don't want that for any
of the women in this church.
So I if I had not become utterly
convinced over the years of how good this
is for women and men to pay attention
to passages such as these, I wouldn't be
preaching it.
It's good for math, good for women, good
for marriages.
Is this all there is to a marriage? No.
But is it a lot of what there is?
Well. I'll tell you
this, fulfilling this law does wonders
for a marriage. Teaching a
man to engage and take responsibility for
his woman. Teaching a woman to advance
her man. It you know what it does,
it ends up compelling both of them to
deal with real issues. And
it consequently deepens their
relationship. It makes the relationship
about the real issues in their lives.
So you see what God is really after in
this law. Is
intimacy real intimacy?
I mean real anticipate. You look at
verse 15, You know this. If he
doesn't speak up, then verse 14, then
he shall bear her iniquity. He shall
bear her iniquity. If you don't engage,
the problems that your wife promises
cause are your fault.
You know you're supposed to engage them
before the bill comes due.
And then you're not supposed to explode.
Ohh how come this is going on?
But do you see what that's saying? It's
your fault. You shall bear her iniquity.
You say. Well, man, that's not fair. But
that's how God wants you to think about
this. He wants above all
in your marriages, intimacy. True
intimacy. And we
seek to go in the other direction. We
seek kind of independence. Do not want
to bother, but God says no, that is not
the level of relationships in the
households of my holy army.
The people in my holy army are
going to engage with one another and
to be for one another, and leaning
into your genders does exactly that. It
makes sure that important matters become
fuel for the relationship.
And it doesn't happen unless you feel
these responsibilities, unless you lean
into the into the genders.
So looking at what women need, looking at
what men need, looking at what marriages
need, I have to say this law is good. It
is good. It is wise.
And you know, I wouldn't need to preach
it if I were surrounded by healthy,
functioning marriages in our in our land.
But you know what I see happening?
Instead, I see the abolition of gender
has taken its toll on marriages.
The dynamic of modern marriages
which pushes individual independence.
It's actually breaks up the marriage.
It degrades the marriage.
What this law does instead is it doesn't.
It does nothing less than demand. This is
what it's really doing. It's demanding
intimacy in your marriage.
And it's showing you how to get there.
The law is good. The law
is good. So
let me, I guess, bring us to a conclusion
here. As long as we're on verse 15, He
shall bear her iniquity. Let's
look at that closely and what it's
saying. He's so
bear her. The Hebrew word of
Noah means crime or punishment.
So you see what he's bearing. It's as
if he's taken over her vow and he's
violated it. And then punishment
that would all all otherwise have fallen
on her for breaking the vow he takes
on. So
it's it's bringing up the the possibility
that there are times when a husband takes
on a wife's iniquity, even he is to
be so close to her that he understands
himself to bear her liabilities. He
takes on her student loans as as if they
were his to pay back.
Right. He takes on her, strains with her,
with her parents, as if they were his to
try to address.
He bears with her problems as if they
were his own. Because you know,
that is the meaning of authority.
In other words, friends, he is to be the
imitator of the perfect bridegroom.
He is the the imitator of none other than
Jesus Christ. Because you know what? That
is exactly what Jesus did for His bride,
us. He took on our student loans even
though he didn't have any.
And he paid them.
What a brightener, what a husband. That
is what he did for us.
Christ did this to make us intimate with
Him. He did this out of His great love
for us, to bring us into intimacy with
Him. That's what His goal is for us. And
for those, you know, some of you here,
you might not actually have a husband,
maybe not even have a father at this
point. For if you're in this position,
there is intimacy for you. There is this
same dynamic to operate in your life.
Christ wants to be your husband.
That's what he holds out to you. It's
there for you.
What should be our response, friends, to
this amazing love? Well, we were about to
do it at the table here. In response to
this, what should we do? We should bring
the import of our whole life before him
to lay it down. And submitted
to him really our ultimate authority.
At this table, that's what you're doing
when you come forward. You're bringing
your whole life to Him. You're letting
Him give you his infallible wisdom.
You're knowing his care for you, his
attentiveness to you. That's
what's going on. I invite you to do it
now. Will you
please stand?